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The Ten Days of Repentance
A Busy DayThe day before Yom Kippur is a busy day, as it includes prayers, meals, immersion in the ritual bath [mikva], and more. These are the details of the events in order:
The Selihot prayers on the eve of Yom Kippur are significantly shorter than those recited on other days. In the morning prayer service, some omit Psalms 100, Mizmor LeToda (“A psalm of thanksgiving”) from Pesukei DeZimra.
From the day before Yom Kippur until after Rosh Hodesh of the month of Marheshvan, one does not recite Tahanun in the daily prayers.
Some perform the ritual of the Annulment of Vows on the day before Yom Kippur, in addition to the day before Rosh HaShana. Likewise, there are those who visit the cemetery on the day before Yom Kippur, as on the day before Rosh HaShana.
Further reading: With regard to these two customs, see the section dealing with the eve of Rosh HaShana, p. 129.
There is a custom on the day before Yom Kippur (especially among Hasidim) to seek from one another, and to give to one another, a slice of honey cake, called lekakh in Yiddish. The reason for this custom is that if on Rosh HaShana it was decreed upon a person that he should be dependent on the favors of others, he will fulfill this decree by asking for a slice of cake from a friend.
Some have the custom to eat several meals on this day. It is customary for men to immerse themselves in a mikva on the day before Yom Kippur, in order to cleanse themselves of any impurity.
On this day, the congregation prays the afternoon prayer service relatively early. At the end of the Amida prayer one adds the long confession (“Al ĥet etc.”) that is recited on Yom Kippur itself. This confession, which details all kinds of sins, can be found in the Yom Kippur prayer books.
Following the afternoon prayers, before the holiday begins, a festive meal is eaten. This is called the seuda hamafseket, the meal before the fast. One should avoid eating heavy foods, such as beef, at this meal so as not to burden the body and tire it out right before the fast and lengthy prayers.
One must be careful to light the holiday candles before Yom Kippur begins. Two blessings are recited over the lighting of the candles:
בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה אֲדֹנָי, אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, אֲשֶׁר קִדְּשָׁנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתָיו וְצִוָּנוּ לְהַדְלִיק נֵר שֶׁל יוֹם הַכִּפּוּרִים (ואם יום הכיפורים חל בשבת: שֶׁל שַׁבָּת וְשֶׁל יוֹם הַכִּפּוּרִים.)
Barukh ata Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha’olam, asher kideshanu bemitzvotav, vetzivanu lehadlik ner shel Yom Hakipurim (on Shabbat conclude instead: lehadlik ner shel Shabbat veshel Yom Hakipurim).
“Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who sanctified us through His commandments, and commanded us to light (on Shabbat add: the Shabbat candle and) the candle of the Day of Atonement.”
בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה אֲדֹנָי, אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם, שֶׁהֶחֱיָנוּ וְקִיְּמָנוּ וְהִגִּיעָנוּ לַזְּמַן הַזֶּה.
Barukh ata Adonai, Eloheinu, melekh ha’olam, sheheĥeyanu vekiyemanu vehigi’anu la’zeman hazeh.
“Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who has given us life, sustained us, and brought us to this time.”
For more details on the procedure of candle lighting, see p. 381.
In addition, it is customary to light a yahrzeit candle that will remaining burning until the end of Yom Kippur. Some have the custom of lighting another family candle, at home or in the synagogue. This candle is called the “candle of life,” and it is lit by the father of the family.
It is customary that before going to the synagogue for the Kol Nidrei prayer service, each father blesses his sons and daughters. The text of the blessing appears in the Yom Kippur mahzor. Many have the custom of placing their hands on the head of each child while reciting that child’s blessing.
The introduction to the blessing for sons is as follows:
יְשִׂימְךָ אֱלֹהִים כְּאֶפְרַיִם וְכִמְנַשֶּׁה.
Yesimekha Elohim ke’Efrayim vekhiMenashe.
“May God make you like Ephraim and like Manasseh” (Genesis 48:20).
For daughters:
יְשִׂימֵךְ אֱלֹהִים כְּשָׂרָה רִבְקָה רָחֵל וְלֵאָה.
Yesimekh Elohim keSara, Rivka, Raĥel, veLe’ah.
“May God make you like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel, and Leah.”
Then the father recites:
יְבָרֶכְךָ אֲדֹנָי וְיִשְׁמְרֶךָ, יָאֵר אֲדֹנָי פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ וִיחֻנֶּךָּ, יִשָּׂא אֲדֹנָי פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ וְיָשֵׂם לְךָ שָׁלוֹם.
Yevarekhekha Adonai veyishmerekha; ya’er Adonai panav elekha viĥuneka; yisa Adonai panav elekha veyasem lekha shalom.
“The Lord shall bless you, and keep you. The Lord shall shine His countenance toward you, and be gracious to you. The Lord shall lift His countenance to you, and grant you peace” (Numbers 6:24–26).
Some add the following prayer:
For a boy:
וִיהִי רָצוֹן מִלִּפְנֵי אָבִינוּ שֶׁבַּשָּׁמַיִם, שֶׁיִּתֵּן בְּלִבְּךָ אַהֲבָתוֹ וְיִרְאָתוֹ, וְתִהְיֶה יִרְאַת ה' עַל פָּנֶיךָ כָּל יָמֶיךָ שֶׁלֹּא תֶחֱטָא, וִיהִי חִשְׁקְךָ בְּתוֹרָה וּמִצְוֹת. עֵינֶיךָ לְנֹכַח יַבִּיטוּ, פִּיךָ יְדַבֵּר חָכְמוֹת, וְלִבְּךָ יֶהְגֶּה אֵימוֹת (=אימת ה'), יָדֶיךָ יַעַסְקוּ בְמִצְוֹת, רַגְלֶיךָ יָרוּצוּ לַעֲשׂוֹת רְצוֹן אָבִיךָ שֶׁבַּשָּׁמַיִם. יִתֶּן לְךָ בָּנִים וּבָנוֹת צַדִּיקִים וְצִדְקָנִיּוֹת עוֹסְקִים בַּתּוֹרָה וּבַמִּצְוֹת כָּל יְמֵיהֶם, וִיהִי מְקוֹרְךָ בָּרוּךְ, וְיַזְמִין לְךָ פַּרְנָסָתְךָ בְּהֶתֵּר וּבְנַחַת וּבְרֶוַח מִתַּחַת יָדוֹ הָרְחָבָה וְלֹא עַל יְדֵי מַתְּנַת בָּשָׂר וָדָם, פַּרְנָסָה שֶׁתִּהְיֶה פָּנוּי לַעֲבוֹדַת הַשֵּׁם, וְתִכָּתֵב וְתֵחָתֵם לְחַיִּים טוֹבִים וַאֲרֻכִּים בְּתוֹךְ כָּל צַדִּיקֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל, אָמֵן.
Vihi ratzon milifnei Avinu shebashamayim sheyiten belibekha ahavato veyirato, vetihyeh yirat Adonai al panekha kol yamekha shelo teĥeta, vihi ĥeshkekha beTorah uvmitzvot. Einekha lenokhaĥ yabitu, pikha yedaber ĥokhmot, velibekha yehgeh eimot, yadekha ya’asku vemitzvot, raglekha yarutzu la’asot retzon Avikha shebashamayim. Yiten lekha banim uvanot tzadikim vetzidkaniyot osekim baTorah uvamitzvot kol yemeihem, vihi mekorkha barukh. Veyazmin lekha parnasatekha beheter uvnaĥat uvrevaĥ metaĥat yado ha’reĥava velo al yedei matnat basar vadam, parnasa shetihyeh panui la’avodat Hashem, vetikatev veteĥatem leĥayim tovim va’arukim betokh kol tzadikei Yisrael, amen.
For a girl:
וִיהִי רָצוֹן מִלִּפְנֵי אָבִינוּ שֶׁבַּשָּׁמַיִם, שֶׁיִּתֵּן בְּלִבֵּךְ אַהֲבָתוֹ וְיִרְאָתוֹ, וְתִהְיֶה יִרְאַת ה' עַל פָּנַיִךְ כָּל יָמַיִךְ שֶׁלֹּא תֶחֶטְאִי, וִיהִי חִשְׁקֵךְ בְּתוֹרָה וּמִצְוֹת. עֵינַיִךְ לְנֹכַח יַבִּיטוּ, פִּיךְ יְדַבֵּר חָכְמוֹת, וְלִבֵּךְ יֶהְגֶּה אֵימוֹת, יָדַיִךְ יַעַסְקוּ בְמִצְוֹת, רַגְלַיִךְ יָרוּצוּ לַעֲשׂוֹת רְצוֹן אָבִיךְ שֶׁבַּשָּׁמַיִם. יִתֶּן לָךְ בָּנִים וּבָנוֹת צַדִּיקִים וְצִדְקָנִיּוֹת עוֹסְקִים בַּתּוֹרָה וּבַמִּצְוֹת כָּל יְמֵיהֶם, וִיהִי מְקוֹרֵךְ בָּרוּךְ, וְיַזְמִין לְךָ פַּרְנָסָתֵךְ בְּהֶתֵּר וּבְנַחַת וּבְרֶוַח מִתַּחַת יָדוֹ הָרְחָבָה וְלֹא עַל יְדֵי מַתְּנַת בָּשָׂר וָדָם, פַּרְנָסָה שֶׁתִּהְיִי פְּנוּיָה לַעֲבוֹדַת הַשֵּׁם, וְתִכָּתְבִי וְתֵחָתְמִי לְחַיִּים טוֹבִים וַאֲרֻכִּים בְּתוֹךְ כָּל צַדִּיקֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל, אָמֵן.
Vihi ratzon milifnei Avinu shebashamayim sheyiten belibekh ahavato veyirato, vetihyeh yirat Adonai al panayikh kol yamayikh shelo teĥeti, vihi ĥeshkekh beTorah uvmitzvot. Einayikh lenokhaĥ yabitu, pikh yedaber ĥokhmot, velibekh yehgeh eimot, yadayikh ya’asku vemitzvot, raglayikh yarutzu la’asot retzon Avikh shebashamayim. Yiten lakh banim uvanot tzadikim vetzidkaniyot osekim baTorah uvamitzvot kol yemeihem, vihi mekorekh barukh. Veyazmin lakh parnasatekh beheter uvnaĥat uvrevaĥ metaĥat yado ha’reĥava velo al yedei matnat basar vadam, parnasa shetihyi penuya la’avodat Hashem, vetikatevi veteĥatemi leĥayim tovim va’arukim betokh kol tzadikei Yisrael, amen.
“May it be the will of our Father in heaven, that He place the love and awe of Him into your heart, and that the awe of the Lord be with you throughout your days, so that you do not sin. May your fervor be for the Torah and mitzvot. May your eyes look straight ahead (Proverbs 4:25), your mouth speak wisdom, and your heart ponder the awe [of God]. May your hands be occupied with mitzvot, may your legs run to perform the will of your Father in heaven. May He grant you righteous sons and righteous daughters, who will occupy themselves with Torah and mitzvot all their days. May your wellspring be blessed, and may God provide you your sustenance in a permitted manner, in comfort and abundance from His broad hand, and not through gifts of flesh and blood, a livelihood that will enable you to be free for the service of God. May you be inscribed and sealed for a good, long life, among all the righteous of Israel. Amen.”
Yom Kippur is considered the holiest day of the year. All of the prohibitions of Shabbat apply on Yom Kippur as well. In addition, there are other prohibitions that stem from the Torah’s requirement to afflict oneself on this day. The Torah states: “However, on the tenth day of this seventh month is the Day of Atonement; a holy convocation it shall be for you, and you shall afflict yourselves…. And you shall not perform any labor on that very day, as it is a day of atonement, to atone for you before the Lord your God” (Leviticus 23:27–28). In this section we shall explain the prohibitions stemming from the requirement of affliction.