As stated above, nowadays the kiddushin, or betrothal, is carried out under the wedding canopy. In order to betroth a woman, a man must give her either money or an object worth at least one peruta (the equivalent of 25 mg of pure silver, in accordance with the current price of silver), and stating that this is for the purpose of betrothal. If the bride responds positively by accepting the money or object from his hand, she is betrothed. Although it is permissible to betroth a woman with a coin or any other object that meets the minimum value stated above, it is customary in all Jewish communities to use a ring for this purpose. Following are some of the halakhot of this ring and the act of kiddushin.

The ring must be the groom’s personal property. Even if his parents purchased the ring for him, they must give it to their son as a full-fledged gift, so that the ring will belong only to him.

According to halakha, the ring must be worth more than one peruta (see above), which is halakhically the minimum monetary value of significance. An object worth less than a peruta is viewed as being of no importance, and therefore is not considered to have monetary value. A ring, and especially one made of precious metal, certainly meets this requirement.

A problem can arise if the bride mistakenly thinks that the ring is worth much more than its actual value. For example, if a man betroths a woman with a ring worth $100, and the woman believes that it is worth $1000, this raises a problem with the process of acquisition. The woman could later claim to have consented to the betrothal only by means of an expensive ring worth $1000, and not through a ring worth substantially less than that. To avoid significant gaps between the bride’s evaluation and the actual value of the wedding ring, it has been established that the kiddushin must be performed with a relatively simple ring, without adornments or precious stones.

There are various customs regarding the shape of the ring. Most use a ring that is round on the outside and inside, while others use a ring that is square on the outside and round on the inside. The same applies to the material from which it is made: Some prefer white gold, while others opt for yellow gold, pure silver, or platinum. Each option is acceptable, but it is important that the appearance of the ring corresponds with its true value.

There are some rabbis who show the ring to the witnesses under the wedding canopy and ask them to confirm that it is worth at least one peruta, and only after the witnesses answer in the affirmative does the rabbi return the ring to the groom for the betrothal.

It is customary for the bride to remove all jewelry that she is wearing before the groom gives her the ring, or before she approaches the canopy.

The kiddushin consists of the groom giving the ring to his bride and declaring: “You are hereby betrothed to me with this ring, in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel.” This is a mitzva like any other, and therefore a blessing is recited before its performance, as described in the following paragraph. In addition, due to its importance, the blessing for the betrothal is preceded by a blessing over a cup of wine. Usually the officiating rabbi recites both blessings, but in certain communities it is the groom who recites the blessings.

The one reciting the blessing takes a full cup of wine in his hand and recites the following:

“Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who creates the fruit of the vine.

“Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who sanctified us through His commandments, and commanded us concerning forbidden relationships, and prohibited to us [intimacy with] women who are betrothed, and permitted to us women who are married to us by means of the wedding canopy and betrothal. Blessed are You, Lord, who sanctifies His people Israel by means of the wedding canopy and betrothal.”

The meaning of the blessing is as follows: “Who…commanded us concerning forbidden relationships” – God prohibited us from marrying or engaging in marital relations with family members. “And prohibited to us women who are betrothed” – He even forbade us from having marital relations with our fiancées. “And permitted to us women who are married to us by means of the wedding canopy and betrothal” – He permitted us to engage in marital relations only after going through the process of huppa and kiddushin. “Blessed are You, Lord, who sanctifies His people Israel by means of the wedding canopy and betrothal” – God sanctifies the people of Israel by permitting them to live as couples only through the wedding canopy and betrothal.

Further reading: For more on forbidden relatives, see A Concise Guide to the Torah, p. 298.

The rabbi then takes a sip of the wine and gives the cup to the groom to drink as well. The groom returns the cup to the rabbi, who hands it over to the bride’s mother, and she helps the bride take a sip. Some have the custom that only the bride and groom drink from the cup, not the rabbi.

After tasting the wine, the groom places the ring on the index finger of the bride’s right hand, and declares:

“You are hereby betrothed to me with this ring, in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel.”

It is customary for those present to respond:

“Betrothed, betrothed, betrothed!”

The witnesses to the kiddushin must watch the groom place the ring on the bride’s finger.